Time.
It's crazy to think how fast time goes by.
Every second, minute, hour... just gone.
We have no control of time.
We do have control of what we do with it though and by doing so, we live our lives.
But, in the blink of an eye,
Your world can change, and without notice.
People come and go.
And the only proof that we have of anything that has happened, are pictures and videos.
Because let's face it, we forget things.
Our minds become clogged with 1st world problems.
So we can keep up with social media.
When it comes to family and friends, they can get put on the back burner sometimes.
This isn't how everyone is.
It's just the majority of our world.
Some of us make good use of our time, such as school or work and of course play.
But taking time for family, we don't do that much; unless of course something happens.
I hate to say this because it absolutely breaks my heart... but I have forgotten what it's like to have Ashley in my life. The more days that go by that she isn't here... the more it seems like it was all a dream that she was ever here at all. The only thing I have to remind myself is pictures and videos.
The memories are fading.
It's not that I forget that she ever lived and is my sister... It just doesn't seem real.
So, in order to try to remember her laugh, her smile, her voice and the color of her eyes and her hair; I look at pictures and watch videos.
With this though comes a wave of depression and tears. Tears that are uncontrollable. And heartache that can't be fixed.
Basically a form of self torture. I don't do it on purpose. It's just the only thing I can cling to that reminds me of who she was:
Free-spirited
Determined
Brave
Eager
Witty
Beautiful
Strong
Intelligent
Competitive
Loving
Caring
Compassionate
Strong-willed
Stubborn
This was my sister.
She was the best friend anyone could have.
She would pick you up when you were down.
She would cook for you when you were tired.
She would befriend anyone who needed someone to listen to them.
And she would love you in her own way.
Yet, she was only allowed 18 years on Earth.
It blows my mind that someone so amazing and successful didn't get a chance to live her life into adulthood.
She was someone who could make changes to this world, given the opportunity.
You don't move on from death.
I'm sorry to say that... especially with those who have recently lost family or friends.
It doesn't get better.
It's more like you learn to live with their absence. But for me... I question that concept daily. Which in turn.. goes back to that self-torture thing of relieving every single detail you can just so you don't lose them. Even if it hurts.
So I guess my message coming from this is:
Keep your loved ones close.
Spend time with them every chance you get.
Tell them you love them.
SHOW them you love them.
And make memories with them while they're still yours.
Because, you never know when things will change.
Every second, minute, hour... just gone.
We have no control of time.
We do have control of what we do with it though and by doing so, we live our lives.
But, in the blink of an eye,
Your world can change, and without notice.
People come and go.
And the only proof that we have of anything that has happened, are pictures and videos.
Because let's face it, we forget things.
Our minds become clogged with 1st world problems.
So we can keep up with social media.
When it comes to family and friends, they can get put on the back burner sometimes.
This isn't how everyone is.
It's just the majority of our world.
Some of us make good use of our time, such as school or work and of course play.
But taking time for family, we don't do that much; unless of course something happens.
I hate to say this because it absolutely breaks my heart... but I have forgotten what it's like to have Ashley in my life. The more days that go by that she isn't here... the more it seems like it was all a dream that she was ever here at all. The only thing I have to remind myself is pictures and videos.
The memories are fading.
It's not that I forget that she ever lived and is my sister... It just doesn't seem real.
So, in order to try to remember her laugh, her smile, her voice and the color of her eyes and her hair; I look at pictures and watch videos.
With this though comes a wave of depression and tears. Tears that are uncontrollable. And heartache that can't be fixed.
Basically a form of self torture. I don't do it on purpose. It's just the only thing I can cling to that reminds me of who she was:
Free-spirited
Determined
Brave
Eager
Witty
Beautiful
Strong
Intelligent
Competitive
Loving
Caring
Compassionate
Strong-willed
Stubborn
This was my sister.
She was the best friend anyone could have.
She would pick you up when you were down.
She would cook for you when you were tired.
She would befriend anyone who needed someone to listen to them.
And she would love you in her own way.
Yet, she was only allowed 18 years on Earth.
It blows my mind that someone so amazing and successful didn't get a chance to live her life into adulthood.
She was someone who could make changes to this world, given the opportunity.
You don't move on from death.
I'm sorry to say that... especially with those who have recently lost family or friends.
It doesn't get better.
It's more like you learn to live with their absence. But for me... I question that concept daily. Which in turn.. goes back to that self-torture thing of relieving every single detail you can just so you don't lose them. Even if it hurts.
So I guess my message coming from this is:
Keep your loved ones close.
Spend time with them every chance you get.
Tell them you love them.
SHOW them you love them.
And make memories with them while they're still yours.
Because, you never know when things will change.
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