I hope you’re ok

 I dreamt of you last night. Every once in awhile you show up in my dreams. Most of the time my dreams are of our youth. You running wild, full of laughter and life; and all of us playing together. Those must have been “the good times”. They frequent my dreams often. 

But last night... last night was different. You were around 18 or maybe even 23 (how old you would be today). In my dream I knew you were gone. However, Shantelle, Kayla, and I were looking for you. 

And we found you! Found you alive. You were sitting on the ground, possibly in the forest or mountainous area. And you said, “you finally found me... I’ve been waiting for you.”

When I first told Chance about this dream I could barely tell him through my tears... and to hear those words spoken aloud tore me apart. My first interpretation of those words were of sorrow, disappointment, and feeling like I had let you down. How could I lose you?! I should know where to find you. But also, are you really lost?? And are you really waiting for us to find you?! My heart can’t bear that thought. How would I save you? Are you telling me that you need me? My heart is breaking at the thought.

I don’t know what my belief is. I would hope your somewhere safe. And that your soul isn’t lost. 

Please be ok. Please don’t feel lost.